Similar to classroom instruction, Residential Counselors hold most of the responsibility at the beginning to ensure students are cared for and meeting obligations in regards to time management and organization. As time goes on, however, we want to begin to transfer that responsibility to students, giving them more ownership over independent living skills. We go about this in a few different ways. Firstly, we believe it’s important to talk about things that successful people do in ways that are easily understood by young teens. In our dorms we provide direct instruction on things like making lists to stay organized, how to use a calendar, how to set alarms on your phone, what it means to have a clean and organized room and how to best use time during study hall. Secondly, we believe it’s crucial to model the desired skills, working side by side students to help them develop in needed areas. Instead of giving students arbitrary tasks like ‘clean your room,’ we may go in and work beside them, showing them what a clean room looks like. During that process it also becomes helpful for staff to share their thinking as to how they are cleaning and organizing.

For some students, the gradual release process happens rather quickly. Students easily catch on to what’s being asked of them and quickly develop independence in various areas. As this happens, support from Residential Counselors pulls back and assistance and check-ins dwindle as the student continues to show independence. We may begin to take down check lists, have fewer room checks or even ask students to help others who may be still learning about organization. In the same way, as students develop positive study habits and become academically organized, they may no longer need to have their homework looked over by a staff member. For other students, the mastery of independent living skills simply takes more time. This can happen for a variety of reasons (limited prior knowledge, executive function challenges, lack of maturity, etc) and we never assume that a student will never master a skill; just that they may need increased supports to do so. The gradual release model allows us to focus on manageable skills while supporting those that are still developing.

Conversely to the academic model of gradual release, life skills do not always follow a linear pattern. We cannot assume that because a student is showing conflict resolution skills independently as a Freshman, they will never need to be supported again in this area. The human condition assumes that there will be times when we need to revisit and retool our life skills, even as adults. For teens, particularly as their repertoire of experiences grows through adolescence and they most literally emerge in their twenties with a different brain, they need reminders, refreshers and reframing to continue to exhibit positive soft skill development across the spectrum. Therefore, we often revisit key parts of our residential curriculum with older kids to make sure they are still capable of independence in this area. Something like positive relationship skills may become very different to a Junior in a new romantic relationship compared to an eighth grader struggling with a roommate just as a Freshman who has learned how to cope with stress may need reminders as Junior year ACTs draw near.